Yes you can actually buy Radioactive Uranium Ore at Amazon. This has to be the funniest item ever listed on Amazon. For starters take a look at “What Do Customers Ultimately Buy After Viewing This Item“… the number one item at 18%: Tickle His Pickle: Your Hands-On Guide to Penis Pleasing. And that’s not all.
You would legitimately want to buy radioactive uranium ore to test our your home Geiger Counter. Apparently the reviewers on Amazon have not quite been using it for that purpose:
” Despite the fact it comes in a can it is not cat food.
Does anyone know if there’s a cure for sudden tentacles? The cat’s huge and well, doesn’t really look much like a cat anymore.”
“I purchased this product because I wanted to make a 5 megaton bomb to impress my neighbors at our fourth of July barbecue. Unfortunately, when all was said and done, I was embarrassed when the yield was less than 500 kt. No birds on fire, no boiling rivers, nothing.”
“My wife and I purchased this product for the expressed purpose of breeding an atomic superman. After a daily regimen of ingesting a tablespoon of this powder mixed with green tea along with her prenatal vitamins, my wife developed serious morning sickness and perished during childbirth.
After clawing his way out of my wife’s dead body, young Yog-Sothoth was promptly hacked to death by a scalpel-happy OB/GYN. That’s HMO care for you!
Please avoid this product if you, like us, are seeking to defy God’s natural order by creating a demonic superhuman demigod.”
Every time I try to use this product, the Libyans show up and steal my Delorian.
That’s just a few highlights; there are well over 100 hilarious reviews of this radioactive Uranium Ore