Toilet Paper Spit Ball Blaster

Stop making spit balls the old fashioned way by wadding up paper into your mouth and get into the 21st century with the Toilet Paper Blaster Skid Shot. More power, more spitballs, more sanitary. This is a spitball machine that uses toilet paper and water to create the ultimate projectile and blasts it up to 30 feet away. Holy sheets! Try doing that with a straw.

Now granted, this device is clearly way more conspicuous when you’re sitting in the back of your classroom launching them as soon as the teacher turns her back, but you could still get away with it if you’re smooth. So it’s probably more for backyard usage, like paintball but with just paper. Just load up a roll of 2 ply toilet paper onto the roll, fill up the chamber with water, and fire away at a rate of about 350 spitballs per roll (2 per sheet). No batteries required.